It happens almost every year. One kid comes to children’s church with a personal mission to prove Santa is not real. Besides the disruption, it creates a situation where one child is calling someone’s mom a liar. That’s why I’m calling to order a special Christmas edition of our Think Tank.
How do you handle the whole issue of Santa Claus in your ministry? How would you redirect a group of children at church who are debating his existence? What advice would you give Christan parents & grandparents about Santa?
This is the question for the December edition of the Children’s Ministry Think Tank. Each month I ask several kids ministry leaders to respond to a challenging situation related to children’s ministry. The answers are always informative, but they are incomplete without your input. So, enjoy the conversation and leave your comment at the bottom of this post.
Response from Wayne Stocks
When I received this month’s Think Tank question, it came just a couple of days after and thorough and exhaustive drilling from my eight-year-old son on whether or not Santa Claus was real. I thought about begging off on this think tank, but this is an issue that those in Children’s Ministry (and parents in general) need to address head on. However, gefore I get to the questions actually posed, let me give you a little bit of background so you know where I am coming from on this issue. I have four kids, they are 16, 8, 6 and 2. I started going to church shortly after my six year old (now almost seven) was born and accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior shortly thereafter. That said, my love for Christmas pre-dates my acceptance of Christ. I love the music, the presents, the gifts, the family and everything else that goes along with Christmas. The focus of my love has shifted since I accepted Christ, but the holiday itself has always held a special place in my heart, and Santa always played a huge part in the Christmas season in my house. Since becoming a Christian, I have wrestled with the topic of Santa almost every year. I know that many well meaning and sincere Christian parents tell their kids that there is no Santa Claus. On the flip side, many equally well-meaning and sincere Christian parents see no issue in Santa. So here’s where I eventually landed on the issue:
- If my kids believe in Santa Claus, that’s ok. Kids believe in all kinds of things. Thanks to Disney, most of our kids believe in talking fish and dinosaurs. J It seems to me that part of being a kid, and part of the fun in dealing with kids, is that imagination and fantasy.
- I will not directly lie to my kids about Santa or anything else for that matter. They will get presents from Santa, and leave a letter for Santa (they will even get a reply every year), and leave cookies each year. If they ask, I may try to change the subject or avoid the question. Heck, I may even play some mind games like “What do you think?” or “Do you get presents from Santa?” But, I won’t take the easy way out and just lie to them. Some people may suggest that this is a distinction without a difference – if you lead your kids to believe in something, that is essentially lying to them. In the interest of full disclosure, this is the issue I wrestle with. However, in the same way I do not feel the need to give my kids a disclaimer that there are no such things as talking vegietables every time I turn on an episode of Veggietales, I don’t mind allowing them believe in Santa.
- My kids need to understand the difference when we talk about Jesus and when we talk about Santa. Jesus is the risen Son of God whose existence and divinity are well attested to and evidenced by Bible and the other sources. Santa is just Santa Claus – a jolly old guy who lives at the North Pole with elves. Unlike Jesus, there is no proof of Santa’s existence. Frankly, I find Santa a good jumping off point for a discussion of the differences between blind faith and reasoned faith. I never want to leave my kids in a position where they can say “Dad said Santa was true and I don’t believe that anymore so maybe I shouldn’t believe what he says about Jesus either.” I think the key to avoiding this is living Christ out in front of them as much as possible. Santa drops off some packages once a year and brings temporary happiness. Christ changes lives and brings us eternal joy.
- Santa can never, and will never, be at the center of Christmas in my house. Christmas is about Christ – plain and simple! Christmas is about God’s plan to save us from our sins. That is the fundamental truth of Christmas and Santa has nothing to do with that. I think so long as my kids understand this, whether or not they believe in Santa is irrelevant. Every good thing comes from above, and whether the delivery man for those things is Santa or Mom and Dad does not really matter!
Now, for the questions actually asked in this think tank:
Santa Claus is not part of my ministry. We focus on Christ in our teaching which is what I think Children’s Ministry should be about every week. I think the issue of Santa is best left to parents. That said, if a group of children is discussing the existence of Santa Claus, my approach is to let them talk it through. I think it is great when kids can start to use their reasoning and analytical abilities to discuss these issues amongst themselves. So long as the conversation is not spiteful and doesn’t devolve into “Yes he does,” “No he doesn’t,” “Yes he does,” I think that such conversations should be encouraged whether they are about Santa or any other topic. Finally, when it comes to advice to parents and grandparents, I think they should follow their own conscience so long as it doesn’t contradict with Biblical authority. I would talk to them about the steps I’ve taken (as indicated above) to ensure that they understand the difference between Santa and Jesus, but beyond that I don’t believe that the existence or non-existence of Santa is really a Biblical issue.
Merry Christmas to you all and a Happy New Year!
Read more from Wayne Stocks on his blog “Dad in the Middle”.
Response from Brenna Phillips
Imagination is a healthy, natural part of a child’s development. Imagination plays an important role in allowing a child to fantasize, pretend, and assign human traits to inanimate objects.
Santa fits right in with the imagination of a young child. But children grow up, mature, and begin to wonder if Santa is real. Older children (especially older siblings) often tease younger children about their continued belief in Santa.
This is the part where adults and leaders can intervene and begin to gently explain another aspect of Santa. Christmas is about giving, not receiving. Santa is the spirit of giving. What happens when a young child asks if he’s real? Adults can explain that he is real is the minds and hearts of those who truly believe in the giving spirit of Christmas. That is a difficult concept for young children to grasp but over a period of time of pondering and teaching and maturation, they will begin to understand.
Here is a bit of advice for parents/grandparents on Santa: It’s ok to believe in Santa with your children but remember to emphasis the true gift-giving meaning of Christmas as the birth of Jesus, the amazing gift God gave to all people.
Brenna Phillips is Children-Family Minister at Mission Fellowship Church in Middletown, Delaware, and teaches preschool students at an early childhood learning center.
Response from Charlie Wallace
We don’t really promote Santa Claus in our children’s ministry. We do not have pictures of Santa on the walls or his “workshop” set up near the entrance. Santa is noticeably absent from our children’s area and that is by design. The church is the place where we learn primarily about Jesus…not Santa.
I’ll be honest. I’ve never heard a conversation concerning Santa Claus between kids take place. If it did overhear some discussion, I would probably just say, “Quit talking about Santa Claus and do” whatever it is that the kids are supposed to be doing.
I believe the crux of this discussion takes place in the home. Every parent has a preconceived notion as to what extent Santa talk will take place in their home. Here is my advice:
- Decide what your family’s view of Santa will be – In other words, Who is Santa to your children? Is he like the tooth fairy or Easter bunny? Is he more then that? Does he possess God-like qualities (He knows when you are sleeping, he knows when you’re awake…he knows when you’ve been bad and good)? Some parents do make way too much out of Santa Claus. Therefore, decide who he will be in your home. Obviously, if you decide to portray Santa a real person with God-like qualities at some point your children will figure out that the picture that you’ve been painting them is a fraud. That brings me to my next point:
- Don’t lie to your kids – Don’t lie to your kids about Santa. If they ask you if he’s real, don’t say that he is. If they ask you if Santa is real, you then have a natural chance to explain what Santa is really all about.
- Don’t fuel your kids’ Santa obsession – Chances are that early on in your child’s life, by the age of 2 or 3, they are going to start an obsession with Santa. It’s unavoidable. The presence of Santa is ubiquitous. Therefore, take care not to further fuel the obsession. I would advise not saying things like, “Santa’s watching you!” That’s just freaky. Besides, God is the only omnipresent, omnipotent and omniscient being of the universe, not Santa Claus. Be careful not to fill your kids’ minds with thoughts about Santa that are God-like.
- Take time to re-orient their thoughts of Santa to those of Jesus – An example would be to give them an Advent calendar where they can count the days of Jesus’ birth and not just the days where they get a lot of presents. This brings me to the hardest one:
- Don’t give your kids a lot of presents – Don’t make Christmas the time where you shower your children with presents. Give them 3, 4, 5…but that’s it. If you want to really celebrate your children, give them a bunch of stuff on their birthday, not Jesus’ birthday. Take the focus off of your children’s hearts being wrapped up in being good for Santa and instead have their hearts attuned to the birth of Jesus the Savior of the world.
Charlie Wallace is the Children’s Pastor of the First Baptist Church of Columbia, SC. He is a regular contributor for our blog. You can read more from Charlie on his blog titled First Kids.
Response from Jared Kennedy and Fletcher Lang
There’s no way around it, pretty much every kid in America is going to know about Santa Claus. Thanks to Coca-Cola, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day parade, and mall atriums everywhere, the jolly ole’ man in red is a cultural Christmas staple who probably isn’t going away any time soon. But as Christian parents or Sunday School teachers, is it a good idea for us to teach our kids that Santa Claus is coming to town?
I think we’ll all agree that during the Advent season, it’s our job to teach kids about the true meaning of Christmas—that Christmas is about Jesus’ incarnation and birth as a baby in Bethlehem. It is about God saving people created in his own image by coming to earth Himself as a man. As long as the incarnated Jesus is the focus of our stories and celebrations, we think it’s okay to tell your kids about Santa – after all, unless they’ve been completely sheltered from the culture, they probably already know.
Here are two key things to consider when teaching kids about Santa Claus:
1) Teach kids the legend of St. Nicholas. Nicholas was a real man who did many good things, and we do well to celebrate his life. Here’s a good article by Pastor Mark Driscoll that tells about Nicholas’ life in plain language: http://theresurgence.com/saint_nicholas
2) Remind kids that they’ll never be good all the time! Santa is not our judge, but if he were and he really was making a list, none of us would be on his “nice” list. Let’s be honest, we’re all still naughty deep down in our hearts. But there has been One who made it on the “nice” list. Jesus, being born of a virgin in a little manger in Bethlehem, was the only person who made it onto God’s “nice” list. And we have hope because, through faith in Him, God has made it possible for us to be added to that list as well! He sees us in all our sin, but He still gives us His good and perfect gifts. So the next time a group of kids are arguing over Santa’s existence, try to point them to Jesus by saying, “If Santa is real, could you really make it onto his nice list?” and by reminding them that Jesus is the true reason for the season.
Jared is the father of three daughters and serves as Associate Pastor for Children’s and Parent Ministries at Sojourn Community Church in Louisville, KY. Fletcher serves as Jared’s pastoral assistant.
Related posts:
{ 11 comments… read them below or add one }
My parents told me there wasn’t such a thing as Santa right away as a child so I did not believe in him. We said the same to our kids and treated him as a fictional character such as Cinderella – allowing them to draw or color in a Santa coloring book and even to visit him at the mall (something they would want to do NOT to tell him what they wanted, but to get the gift he would give out to those who talked to him).
In the preschool I directed, we did not emphasize Santa at all. If a child brought him up either that she believed or didn’t believe, we redirected everyone back to the task at hand. We were aware that we had parents who told their child there was a Santa and those who were very anti-Santa – so we avoided the subject and focused on Luke 2 and things like snowmen, bells, wreaths etc.
My co-director was adamant about this. She was told there was a Santa. When she was as a seven-year-old her mom told her that he wasn’t real, she immediately decided that God wasn’t real either and it took several years for her to believe the Bible once again. She determined right then she would never tell a child that someone was real that wasn’t.
I am a parent and a pastor of children and my wife and I have battled with the Santa Claus issue since I have become a Christian less than 10 years ago. My 10 year old daughter has special needs, so when she was able to appreciate presents under the tree she simply looked back at her mother and I and said, “Thank you mommy and Daddy, thank you!” We never swayed her heart that it was really some fictional fellow that gave her those gifts and not the love and nurture of her parents that found “just what she wanted.”
When my 5 year old son, Fisher was born we decided to make a few changes to the way that Christmas was celebrated in our home to recapture the true meaning. So we celebrate advent in a way that celebrates the redemptive work of Christ (see grace2kids.wordpress.com) and brings our hearts into contact with the true gospel.
That said, we do not celebrate Santa Claus. There are no Santa Claus ornaments. No Santa Claus music. There is most certainly no way that I could see my kids asking for everything under the sun and pretend that that is okay. It is entirely selfish. Then we turn and say the “Spirit of Santa is giving.” Number one, this is just not true, the kids don’t even know who gave, they only receive. So the “Spirit of Santa” is receiving. This is not what I want to teach my kids. I will relay one questions my 5 year old asked after getting in trouble in school for telling kids there is no Santa. I told him that he cannot do that that it is up to their parents to do that, he responded, “Why do their parents not want them to know that they want to give them presents?” I had no answer. Number two, Santa has no spirit! He is not real! He certainly is not God. He is pretend! No I do not explain that Spider-Man is not real to my son, I do not pretend that he is either. My son gets that, he is then free to pretend. He cannot understand healthy and true belief and faith in this age of “your truth is your truth, God is real, if he is real to you” if we confuse the real faith of the Creator of the Universe with some silly man in a red suit that has captured the culture of this country because it promotes higher levels of spending, not giving, spending.
The advice that I give to parents is to find ways to be Christian as Christmas. For my family, Santa didn’t make the cut.
In the times we live in today, Santa, Clause has always been part of society. There is no way getting around it. Of course Christ is the reason for the season, but we can’t be blind to what surrounds our children. Its up to us as parents and Children’s Ministers to teach our children what is real and what is not. We cannot live in a box, yes children need to know the truth. Putting santa down to an unbeliever may destroy the child emotionally. some children have santa and who know what else to believe in. That why its so important to use our words wisely in front of our children. Our children take part in many things in activites in school that have nothing to do with God. Are we going pull them out of school during easter, christmas and other holidays? I don’t think so. That why it is so important the word of God be planted into the heart of the child, so that although he/she may take part in the singing of songs and santa decorations in school in their heart they know the true meaning of christmas. ( Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it). Why not turn the picture and turn santa into a character who is giving, and compassionte to those in need? According to the story he did give to those in need. In his heart he felt compassion for those less fortunate. Please do not misunderstand. Christ should always be the center of our teaching. the children do need to know, the difference between the power of Christ and santa clause. The gift of Christ is not in the month of December, but its an everyday gift God gives us and our children.
We chose not to tell our children about Santa. I explained to them that Santa was not real. When people in the stores would ask my kids what Santa was going to bring them I just told them we didn’t do Santa.
At church, when kids bring up the subject, I do not tell them one way or the other. I tell them to go talk to their parents about it and I do not let the kids argue about Santa either. I would tell them that at church we celebrate Christmas as Jesus birth and I leave it at that.
I recently made a post about how I feel about Santa…
As a child I remember going to church very few times. I was raised with the knowledge of Santa, the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy and took part in dressing up on Halloween. It wasn’t until I was in 10th grade that I attended a Christian school where I had a daily Bible class and a weekly church service that I had to attend.
When I became a Christian I saw these things very differently and the Lord has convicted my heart in regards to those things I listed above.
I am really amazed at how many ‘Christians’ allow the world into their holiday celebrations and how they go about rationalizing their thoughts.
As a mother, I have no desire to lie or mislead my children by telling them that something exsists when it doesn’t – it’s just not right.
Santa is everywhere. Just go into any store and you will see more of Santa than Jesus. When my kids were little, around the holidays, we would go into stores and my kids would be asked, “What’s Santa bringing you?” As I said, it’s all about Santa…what a shame…
Have you ever thought about Santa…I mean REALLY thought about him…
?he knows if you have been naughty or nice
?he is a rewarder of good
?he is everywhere
?he sees all things
?he performs miracles
Who does this sound like? Yes, it sounds like God.
Satan is a liar and a deceiver. He is very crafty. He uses Santa to lure people away from Christ. Just rearrange the letters in SANTA and you get SATAN.
The Easter Bunny is the same. Satan’s tool to lure people away from the truth of the resurection of Christ.
If it weren’t for Santa and the Easter Bunny to distract the world, how many more Christians do you think there would be today? How much more focus would be on Jesus? What if the Christians would have taken a stand and said NO to these characters and took a firm stand in their homes against them?
“Oh, it’s just fun for the kids. It doesn’t hurt them.” Really? Does it bring them closer to God or further away from Him?
And for those churches that have ‘Breakfast with Santa’ as their outreach…just how many of those kids make a profession of faith? How many of those kids come back to church on a regular basis? And just want damage is it doing to the kids already attending church?
Jesus always taught the truth. I don’t find where he used pagen things in his stories or parables. Do you think Jesus would be for Santa, the Easter Bunny or for celebrating Halloween?
“What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?” – 2 Corinthians 6:16
We are called to change to world, not by being of the world, but by being different.
1 John 5:21, “Dear children, keep yourselves from idols.”
That was truly well said Shay my thoughts exactly, parents need to stop telling there kids about santa.This is a subject every year that makes me extremely uncomfortable and during the Christmas season that is all you hear and see is this santa claus.I know that satan uses this as a tool because if he can get our kids believing in santa claus, the easter bunny and the tooth fairy when the kids find out that all of them are a lie then it will be very hard to convince our children that Jesus Christ our savior is real, this is very dangerous satan is very clever and he knows what to do to take our kids to hell with him.Parents please stop being an evangelist for satan and making your kids believe in this satan claws.GOD Bless please put JESUS first !!
As to how to handle the Santa issue. Years ago when my kids were little.
I told them about the orginal St Nicholas and what he did. Then told them about how much fun it is to prtend how he is real now etc. I found it interesting that after all that “truth telling about Sant’” how they continued to enjoy “believing in Santa” They just enjoyed the idea of Santa
presents and the cookies being put out and thinking that he could be on our roof with the rein deer. I of course, would gather them every night for the advent candle and have them take part in a scripture, lighting the candle and singing a song together and I hear more about that then what Santa brought them after they are grown,now. We’d also do the manager scene and put the wise men a ways away and share with them how it took them awhile to get to baby jesus etc. They enjoyed all that.
To be a parent in a real Christian home it would be elementary to say, “You should not ever lie”. Is the believe and teaching to Children about Santa a lie. “YES” , Then don’t do it. Have You ever studied the origin of Santa Claus? I challenge You to do so. Their is nothing of Christ Jesus in it. The same with “Trick or Treat”, the easter bunny etc. Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world, for if any Man love the world , the Love of the Father is not in Him. Allow The Spirit of Christ to take over Your life and give up the traditions “Lies” of the world. Be strong in the Lord and serve Him with a new backbone to replace the weak one we all sometimes have.
As an “old” Children’s Pastor and a mom of 4 grown kids, I have seen a lot of ways kid’s church handles Santa, mostly just ignoring him. I took this year as an opportunity to use the subject in this past weekend’s service, not to prove or disprove Santa, but to remind the kids that their parents are the people to go to when other kids tell them things they don’t believe. It was a good example of how someone at school may disagree with what they believe. And if their peers are telling them things different from what they believe, talking with their parents will help them understand why they believe what they do.
As far as the argument of “you lied to me about Santa, so you must be lying about God, too” argument, I did a blog about that last week. I copied the main point here:
Third: And really the only valid reason here, hopefully, our children see enough of God in our lives all year long that there couldn’t be a doubt that God is real. Santa is only in the picture at Christmas and when the threat of the naughty list is needed to keep wayward kids in line. God is with us every day. When we as parents live out our faith day to day, our kids have seen God provide for our needs whether they be financial, physical, or any other realm of need we may have. When we live out the Deut. 6 family, our kids know there is a God.
I was recently faced with a situation where somebody in the grocery store was trying to ask my child about Santa Claus and what kind of presents she would get. She played along, because she enjoys talking to people, but it really bothered me. After all, I don’t believe Santa Claus is real. Likewise, I don’t believe God is real. I won’t lie to my child, but this is a huge problem in our society! How can I tell the person to stop talking to my child about fictitious nonsense without offending the other person or embarrassing them? Maybe I should just wear a turban around my head so people don’t just assume I believe in the ridiculous things they believe in? (They’ll probably assume I believe in other ridiculous things, but at least they won’t try to include my child in their Christian non-sense.) Oh, and to Wayne Stocks above… I don’t see how you can separate the idea of Santa Claus from the idea of Jesus being the risen son of God. They are equally nonsense. Allowing your kid to believe ridiculous things is unfair to them. They should be taught how to discern truth from supposition. Let them have their imagination and fun, but make sure they understand it is just for fun.
My children never came right out and ask the question…is there a Santa, nor did I tell them Santa was real. I agree with Jared and Fletcher. The most important thing is that they know the difference between what Santa can do and what Christ did for us. As for Christmas being a time of giving…that is true and I love to give gifts to people…not just my family. So giving is important, but I think we should also teach our children to give our hearts to God and receive Him and His gifts. John 3:12-13 “But to all who received Him (Jesus), to all who believed in His hname, He gave the right to become children of God, who were born not of blood nor of the will of the flesh nor of the will of man, but of God.” When we receive from God we learn to give to God and others. By giving we receive. We give out of a thankful heard for the Grace of God we’ve received and that brings glory to God and others. God bless you all and Happy Birthday Jesus!
Do you remember growing up as a little kid worrying about which one of Santa’s lists you would be on? Would you be on the “Naughty” list or the “Nice” list? It just so happens that kids today don’t have to wonder about that anymore. They can just go to Santa’s web site to find out which list they’re on. Check it out!http://www.christmassantaclaus.com/naughty_nice.asp
What’s the big deal with Santa? Does it really matter if we include him in our Christmas? Does it really influence our children?
Noel Piper, in her book, Treasuring God in Our Traditions, says that perhaps the biggest reason why her family has chosen to never include Santa Claus in their Christmas is that Santa is so much like what we’re trying all year to teach our children about God. Think about the “attributes” of Santa:
He’s omniscient-he sees everything you do
He rewards you if you’re good
He’s omnipresent-at least, he can be everywhere in one night!
He gives you good gifts
He’s the most famous “old man in the sky” figure
Noel goes on to say,
But at the deeper level that young children can’t comprehend yet, he is not like God at all. For example, does Santa really care if we’re bad or good? Think of the most awful kid you can remember. Did he or she ever not get gifts from Santa? What about Santa’s spying and then rewarding you if you’re good enough? That’s not the way God operates. He gave us his gift–his Son–even though we weren’t good at all. “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). He gave us his gift to us to make us good, not because we had proved ourselves good enough.
I couldn’t say it any better myself. By the way, I ended up going to Santa’s site and took The Incredible Elf-omatic Naughty or Nice Determinator and passed with a B+. Santa told me, “Way to go, Doug! Your halo may be a little bit crooked but you’re definitely on Santa’s “Nice List”!
{ 4 trackbacks }